|
George Berger
|
 |
« Reply #25 on: February 07, 2012, 04:34:44 PM » |
|
Just imagine what funhorrors could ensue if you had a fax number listed on your website.  BTW, the excerpts in that email are actually taken, in sequential order, from a short story that will be published next week. It's somewhat less terrifyingly creepy than the out-of-context phrases might suggest. I'll be sure to include your "rather stab myself in the face" quote under "editorial reviews".  |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
ETS PRESS
|
|
« Reply #26 on: February 07, 2012, 04:35:59 PM » |
|
Krista, I sent you a copy of my book. I know that you are going to love it. My mother read it and said it was just as good as that J.K. Rowling woman. You are going to love it. It's a mystery, romance, suspense, thriller, sci-fi, paranormal book with vampires, zombies, aliens, and really hot guys. Please read it and post your five star, gushing review on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Goodreads, Library Thing, Shelfari, and your blog by Friday. Oh, and you can post it to Facebook and tweet about it too. You've never read a book as wonderful as this book. You are going to laugh and cry, and probably sing and dance. You will be so sad when it's over that you will beg for the next 6 books in the series, but you will have to buy those. They are only $14.99 each on Kindle. Oh, yeah, for your convenience, I sent the book in Kindle format. It's DRM so no one can steal it from you.  |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
JeanneM
|
|
« Reply #27 on: February 07, 2012, 04:39:24 PM » |
|
Oh, this is just great! Now who is going to review my book, "A Bottomfeeders Guide to the Tse-Tse Fly or How I Learned to Stop Scratching and Love the Bite." ?
You will be hearing from my attorneys "Dewey, Cheatham, and Howe" forthwith!
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Krista D. Ball
|
|
« Reply #28 on: February 07, 2012, 04:50:36 PM » |
|
What happened to the fork in the eye?!  It needs replacing. It's not hygienic anymore. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Krista D. Ball
|
|
« Reply #29 on: February 07, 2012, 04:52:05 PM » |
|
Oh, this is just great! Now who is going to review my book, "A Bottomfeeders Guide to the Tse-Tse Fly or How I Learned to Stop Scratching and Love the Bite." ?
You will be hearing from my attorneys "Dewey, Cheatham, and Howe" forthwith!
I know a few small publishers through being Canadian  and every so often, our group gets asked if anyone has heard of so-and-so agent. Some authors pretend to be agents in hopes of impressing these publishers! And the kicker? Their writing is so bad that even the approach letter turns people off. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
George Berger
|
|
« Reply #30 on: February 07, 2012, 04:52:58 PM » |
|
It needs replacing. It's not hygienic anymore.
Use a spoon. It hurts more. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Krista D. Ball
|
|
« Reply #31 on: February 07, 2012, 04:55:58 PM » |
|
Use a spoon. It hurts more. I love that movie. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
George Berger
|
|
« Reply #32 on: February 16, 2012, 05:14:05 PM » |
|
I'd rather stab myself in the face than read another page of this book.
Krista D. Ball, author of Road to Hell and other well-written books
Thanks again for the endorsement, by the way. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
smreine
|
|
« Reply #33 on: February 16, 2012, 05:22:40 PM » |
|
Loosely inspired by real-life events, Nothing Like Love is a poorly-written and unsatisfying 5,400-word short story quite likely to disappoint you. Don't say I didn't warn you. I think I love you. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Krista D. Ball
|
|
« Reply #34 on: February 16, 2012, 05:29:58 PM » |
|
Oh George *kissy fingers*
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Hugh Howey
|
|
« Reply #35 on: February 16, 2012, 05:31:21 PM » |
|
This thread is a lot funnier than I think it intended to be. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
Krista D. Ball
|
|
« Reply #36 on: February 16, 2012, 05:43:39 PM » |
|
This thread is a lot funnier than I think it intended to be. That's because this is a mean, heartless group. I love it. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
George Berger
|
|
« Reply #37 on: February 16, 2012, 06:21:26 PM » |
|
Oh George *kissy fingers*
Phew. I'm very relieved you're not deathly mad at me. This thread is a lot funnier than I think it intended to be. I think the moderators will all agree, one of the true strengths of the folks here is our willing, nay eager, ability to go, and stay, off-topic... usually in the best of ways. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
David Kazzie
|
|
« Reply #38 on: February 16, 2012, 06:37:42 PM » |
|
SO that's a "no," on the review, then?
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
 $2.99 |
|
|
|
Krista D. Ball
|
|
« Reply #39 on: February 16, 2012, 06:39:41 PM » |
|
Phew. I'm very relieved you're not deathly mad at me. Bah, I've tweeted your link. I might add this link to my usual tweeting. Afterall, I currently have a "reasons not to buy my book" series of Tweets. Being mean to other authors will be a good one. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
George Berger
|
|
« Reply #40 on: February 16, 2012, 07:16:21 PM » |
|
Bah, I've tweeted your link. I might add this link to my usual tweeting. Afterall, I currently have a "reasons not to buy my book" series of Tweets. Being mean to other authors will be a good one.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Krista D. Ball
|
|
« Reply #42 on: February 16, 2012, 07:58:50 PM » |
|
And I didn't even show up so the mods would have to separate Krista and me.  However, I do have a forthcoming werewolf, sparkling vampire, wizard schoolboy novel which I'm sure she will be delighted to review for me.  Don't bother. "This sucks. Seriously, how could anyone think a wizard and a sparkling vampire could sell?" - Krista D. Ball, author of too many great works to mention. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
George Berger
|
|
« Reply #43 on: February 16, 2012, 08:04:43 PM » |
|
And I didn't even show up so the mods would have to separate Krista and me. However, I do have a forthcoming werewolf, sparkling vampire, wizard schoolboy novel which I'm sure she will be delighted to review for me. Maybe this belongs in that whale-and-minnow thread, but I can accept a wizardly schoolboy and a sparkling vampire, but a forthcoming werewolf? Nope, sorry. Disbelief un-suspended. (I kid, I kid. ) |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Krista D. Ball
|
|
« Reply #45 on: February 16, 2012, 09:14:43 PM » |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
George Berger
|
|
« Reply #47 on: February 16, 2012, 09:23:36 PM » |
|
He is a GAY werewolf. So you can't disbelief un-suspend. It would be homophobic. BAD you.
Oh, well, a forthcoming GAY werewolf makes perfect since, since once can't expect a (were)wolf to be a bear, can one? Anyway, no, I think it's only bad me if I write a lengthy, vitriolic review harping on about the tenuous perfidy of using lycanthropy as a strained metaphor for homosexuality. But what to title it? "Nature, Nurture, or Nibble?", perhaps? --George, in the name of the Brother, the Handgun, and the Silver Bullet... |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
JRTomlin
|
|
« Reply #48 on: February 16, 2012, 09:26:57 PM » |
|
Oh, well, a forthcoming GAY werewolf makes perfect since, since once can't expect a (were)wolf to be a bear, can one? Anyway, no, I think it's only bad me if I write a lengthy, vitriolic review harping on about the tenuous perfidy of using lycanthropy as a strained metaphor for homosexuality. But what to title it? "Nature, Nurture, or Nibble?", perhaps? --George, in the name of the Brother, the Handgun, and the Silver Bullet...Nature, Nurture and Kibble is what I was thinking but that neglects my poor sparkling vampire. And the schoolboy. Nature, Fireball and Kibble. But someone might mistake fireball for furball and think they're buying a vampire kitty novel. *ponder ponder* |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
| Historical Novels: |  |  |  | Fantasy: |  |  |
|
|
|
|
George Berger
|
|
« Reply #49 on: February 16, 2012, 09:34:02 PM » |
|
Drinker, Thinker, Kibble, Guy?
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Dilber MC Theme by HarzeM
